Monday, 27 May 2013
So, my period showed up on a Saturday. I called my local satellite clinic and asked if I could come in for my baseline suppression check. They told me that they can do the ultrasound but there is no one to do the blood. I will have to go to another lab to get that done. I say that's fine by me.
I try to pick the lab and verify their hours, but I can't dial any of their 800 numbers because I am calling from out of country. So, I call the nurse back to ask for her help. She says not to worry because the technician is going to come in for me. Phew.
I have my blood drawn then go for my ultrasound. And, she finds another cyst. This time it's bigger than the last. I try to remain composed until I leave the office. I thank them for all of the organizing that they did for us. They tell us they will see us next month.
I cry for the hour drive home. The last time they cancelled the cycle my blood work was ok, but the cyst was over their maximum 15mm threshold. I know it's over for this month. Also we figure it out and think that July is likely a bust too because it's right around the time we would need to be at CCRM we are both in a wedding.
Cue a massive dose of feeling sorry for ourselves. I feel like this is it. This is the end. This is all I can take. I want to move on to greener pastures. I am done with this bullshit. I'm done feeling bad all of the time because of this. I have very limited emotional strength left and I want to use it up on something that has a higher chance of things working. Maybe we should donate the $5,000 of meds we have at home and move on to egg donation. D starts talking about fostering. I envision having a foster child, getting attached and then the child being taken away from us. I snap back at D no way.
We got a call from CCRM that my blood work is showing as within the acceptable range. My estrogen was 55 and my progesterone 0.5. Whoop-de-do. Dr. Surrey has reviewed everything and if we can have it aspirated that day, or the next day we can proceed with the IVF.
We're confused but happy.
We call back our local clinic to see if the cyst can be dealt with within the 36 hours. The doctor that is supposed to be on call isn't there. He apparently reviewed the clinic's cases and then went on vacation with his family because their was nothing on their docket. I was not because I am a satellite patient and I did not call in to say when I was expecting my CD2 (which I was not asked to do, nor do I ever even know in advance).
The nurse tries to call back of the on-call doctor with no luck. Then she tries to get a local hospital or OBGYN to help us. Nothing.
We call CCRM back and ask if the cyst can just be aspirated within 48 hours, on Tuesday. What's the difference of 12 hours, right?
CCRM says no. She also tells us that there's a possibility of the cycle being cancelled within the first 3-5 days of starting stims if the cyst comes back.
We go and do a quick errand for a friend. Then we laid around the house and felt sorry for ourselves. In the process we made a big mess of our house. Eating pizza. Laying in bed. Laying on the swing outside and reading/surfing. Acting like complete pigs.
We thought up a new plan. We call a friend whose wife is a physician. Maybe she has some contacts that could help us? They don't know about our IF, but we decide to disclose because this is important. She does not.
We called our fertility clinic from three years ago. We have their on call number and think maybe the doctors are doing procedures on Memorial Day? Maybe they would consider this for us because we are previous patients? We call but can't get past their after hours secretary.
Our satellite clinic calls back and suggests that they can do the procedure first thing on Tuesday. We think about lying to CCRM and just doing it "our way" anyways. We remember the little talk CCRM gives everyone on their one day work up about us coming to CCRM for a reason, and trying to follow the doctor's advice, if you want the doctor's success rates. We decide that it's a bad idea to lie.
We suddenly think, "why can't we go to Denver for this?". We call CCRM and they squeeze us in for an appointment at 10:30 a.m. the next day. It's now 5:30 p.m. We tell them we will check flights and call them back.
There is one leaving in 1 hour 40 minutes. But the airport is at LEAST a 1 hour drive from our house. And it's a long weekend with city traffic. The flight is not cheap either. We decide we can't make it in that time frame. If we had 20 minutes more we could have made it work.
We decide that maybe our local Canadian doctor's office might be able to do something tomorrow. It's not a holiday on Monday. Maybe that will work?
I call first thing in the morning, but my OBGYN on vacation.
I call a local fertility doctor. Maybe he'll be sympathetic? The secretary says they only do it in in an operating room, and there isn't one booked for today, so he can't.
We give up. It's over for this month.
Pretty much if my period came on ANY other day this month it, or we had thought of traveling to Denver just a little bit sooner, we could have worked it out.
The only silver lining is that we have a sweet mostly free trip now booked. D gets the trip because of a volunteer position that he holds. We were going to skip it, but now we get to go. England, Holland Luxembourg and Belgium here we come!
PS) Any favourite destinations there? We are taking suggestions!