Thursday, 21 August 2014

Healing dinner

We had Lainey and Paul over for dinner last night. They brought their teenaged nephew who was visiting from overseas, and their gorgeous 2 month old daughter. 

I made this yum-um-my plum cobbler for the first time. Served warm with a little vanilla ice cream, it was devine. I would cut way back on the 3/4 cup of sugar added to the plums. They are sweet on their own. It was a nice change. I don't usually make desserts with plums, although now I wonder why I haven't before. I thought I would share. 

http://www.simplyrecipes.com/m/recipes/plum_cobbler/

(Sorry- I'm typing this on my phone and I don't know how to make this a link)

Lainey and Paul are the couple that I wrote about having the heart wrenching and almost failed adoption earlier this summer. We haven't been to see them earlier because we were away, but we've been communicating often. 

Oh friends, it was such a perfect visit, at such a perfect time. We're so lucky to have them as friends.  Seeing them gushing over their little girl, and seeing D hold her (in the funny awkward/frozen way he does, lol) was so great to see. Holding that sweet tiny baby was was so therapeutic for me. 

I loved listening to her share about which type of stroller she chose, and why, and so many little details of how they are parenting. It's the first time in a long time, (or maybe ever!) that I remember acutally enjoying this kind of dicussion. I think I am healing, folks! 

The visit was perfect timing, and really helped wash away so much of yesterday's stress and anxiety. That is what we are after. That is why we have endured, and will continue.  

They have the same social worker and agency worker that we have, so they can relate to so much of what we are going through. What helps also, is that Lainey is a social worker so she's really good at listening, not judging and offering support. 

With the exception of D's mother, they will be the only ones (in 'real' life- I'm so glad to have all of you here too!) that we will confide in about specifics about the pregnancy and the birth parents. Our social worker has reminded us to use discretion, because much of this is our child's information. They should get to know their history before the rest of the world does, she says, and I agree. 

I'm also keenly aware that some of my veggie-charting friends might judge this baby, even if they don't know they are doing it. I want to shield him or her from that as much as I can. 

I feel like I'm becoming a Mama.  Tears are pouring out now.

5 comments:

  1. Sarah, you are already such a wonderful mama to this baby. I'm glad this dinner was so good for your soul.

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  2. I'm so happy that you're at peace with your decision--I think you're right to be concerned, but it sounds like from what you're hearing and reading more than likely everything will be fine. I think your decision to move forward with the adoption is so wonderful--it's bringing tears to my eyes. Congratulations!

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  3. From someone who knows.....don't worry about the use. It will be ok....

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  4. I had been wondering how your friends' adoption story had turned out, and I'm so glad that they have their little girl home now, and that they could share their joy with you! It does sound like perfect timing for a much needed encouraging meeting.
    It hurts me, somehow, that you have to keep your child's details secret. I understand the reasons, but I wish our society weren't so judgmental.
    And it is wonderful to "see" you cry tears of joy.

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  5. So happy to hear you had such a lovely dinner with your friends. I'm sure there was so much love and advise coming your way from them. Congrats to you guys for moving forward and congrats to them on their new little girl! xoxo

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